very-funny

THREE WOMEN Three women, two younger, and one a senior citizen, were sitting naked in a sauna. Suddenly, there was a beeping sound. The first young woman pressed her forearm and the bee stopped. The others looked at her questioningly. "That was my pager," she said. "I have a microchip under the skin …

Be careful what you wear (or don't wear), when working under your vehicle... especially in public. From the Sydney Morning Herald Australia comes this story of a central west couple who drove their car to K-Mart only to have their car break down in the parking lot. The man told his wife to carry on with the sho…

I will always need my son, no matter what age I am. My son has made me laugh, made me proud, made me cry, hugged me tight, seen me fail, cheered me up, kept me on my toes, and at times driven me crazy. My son is a promise that I will have a friend forever. When I was having mood swings and foods I previously loved ma…

The rescue squad was called to the home of an elderly couple for an apparent heart attack the gentleman had. When the squad got there it was too late and the man had died. While consoling the wife one of the rescuers noticed that the bed was a mess. He asked the lady what symptoms the man had suffered and if anythi…

Ole and Sven are elderly friends who die in a snowmobiling accident, drunker than skunks And go to Hell. The Devil observes that they are really enjoying themselves. He says to them ‘Doesn’t the heat and smoke bother you?’ Ole replies, ‘Vell, ya know, ve’re from nordern Minnesooota, da land of snow an ice, an ve’re…

A 6 yr old boy was in the market with his 4 yr old sister. Suddenly the boy found that his sister was lagging behind. He stopped and looked back. His sister was standing in front of a toy shop and was watching something with great interest. The boy went back to her and asked, “Do you want something?” The sister poi…

An old cowboy died and he’s at the pearly gates, Waiting to be admitted while St. Peter is leafin’ through this Big Book to see if the guy is worthy. St. Peter goes through the Book several times and furrows his brow, “You know, I can’t see that you ever did anything really bad in your life, but you never did anyth…

Bert is 85 years old and always wanted a pair of soft spike golf shoes like Fred Couples wore on his tour. So, seeing a pair on sale after his round, he bought them. He was so delighted with his purchase, he decided to wear them home to show the Mrs Walking proudly into the house, he sauntered into the kitchen and …