very-funny

“Late again!” the third-grade teacher sternly said to Little Johnny. “It ain’t my fault this time, Miss Russell. You can blame this ‘un on my Daddy. The reason I’m three hours late is my Daddy sleeps naked!” Miss Russell had taught grammar school for 30-some-odd years. Despite her mounting fears, she asked little J…

Omg can’t stop laughing WARNING FOR ALL MALES FROM ME Last weekend I saw something at The Gun Show that sparked my interest. I was looking for a little something different for my wife Dana. What I came across was a 100,000-volt, pocket/purse-sized Tazer. The effects of the Tazer were supposed to be short lived, with …

One evening a man was at home watching TV and eating peanuts. He'd toss them in the air, and then catch them in his mouth. In the middle of catching one, his wife asked him a question - and as he turned to answer her, a peanut fell in his ear. He tried and tried to dig it out but succeeded in only pushing it in…

A couple was celebrating their golden wedding anniversary. Their domestic tranquillity had long been the talk of the town, and on this special occasion, a local newspaper reporter paid them a visit. He inquired as to the secret of their long and happy marriage. “Well,” explained the husband, “it all goes back to ou…

Ken and his wife Edna went to the state fair every year, and every year Ken would say, “Edna, I'd like to ride in that helicopter” Edna always replied, “I know Ken, but that helicopter ride is fifty bucks, and fifty bucks is fifty bucks” One year Ken and Edna went to the fair, and Ken said, “Edna, I'm 75 ye…